Splinters
by Horus.Potter
Summary: Hermione and Ron are enjoying an after work drink with Harry and Ginny when they excuse themselves for a little alone time in the bathroom. HG/RW HP/GW


**Splinters **

((()))

"Ron, what are you doing?" Hermione giggled as Ron pulled her into the men's room of the Leaky Cauldron. "This is the men's –" her speech was cut off by his lips on hers. She moaned against the action as he slid his hands to her bottom and hoisted her up. Her legs wrapped around him in a tight vice as he carried her to the counter and deposited her there.

"Ron." She mumbled, opening her eyes to look at him, "We're in a public loo. Anyone can just walk in!" he silenced her with a kiss.

"Hermione," he placed a kiss to her jaw, "Shut." Another kiss, this time to her neck, "Up." His lips were upon hers again.

Hermione hit him playfully and he smirked. "I want you." he said with purest desire, causing Hermione to blush and feel needy in all her wicked places.

She scooted her body closer to the edge of the counter and claimed his lips in a searing kiss. She was working on undoing his pants as he took the time to attend to her clothing, when he let out a frustrated growl. "I hate pants." He said, yanking her jeans down haphazardly and she held onto the sink for leverage. "I much prefer skirts."

Hermione smirked, "I'm sorry my attire is not befitting of your sexual needs."

Ron kissed her again, smiling against her mouth. "Don't get me wrong, you look bloody gorgeous in these jeans 'mione. They're just a bit harder to maneuver." While he had been talking he'd succeeded in getting her jeans and panties down where they hung loosely by her shins, and he pushed a finger into her, 'causing her to moan and shut her eyes. "But I'll manage." He pumped in and out of her, slowly, torturing her blissfully.

He looked at her face, mouth slightly agape, eyes lidded; he loved her so much it hurt. He kissed her, holding the back of her head with his free hand, "I love you." he whispered, kissing the soft spot just under her ear.

"I love you." she tangled her hands in his thick red hair and forced their lips together.

He angled their bodies so that he could enter her and finally he was inside her, thrusting hard against her. Hermione held onto his shoulders, trying to stifle the sounds fighting to escape her body. Ron's hands cupped her backside, pulling her closer until she was barely on the counter at all. Hermione slid further off the counter and released a small shriek as she slipped off the surface entirely, holding onto Ron for support. Ron stumbled backward and they crashed to the ground laughing, lucky that neither was injured. Hermione straddled him on the bathroom floor as best she could still bound by her jeans around her legs.

"You know Ronald I agree." She kissed him, "Skirts are much better."

He smirked and she began riding him to completion. As they released their love and stood on shaky legs they tried to dress quickly, realizing they'd already been gone too long and they were lucky no one had come in yet.

Hermione winced as she attempted to pull up her panties and jeans in one motion.

Ron, noticing the wince, asked, "What's wrong love?"

"My butt. There's –" she reached a hand behind her and felt a sharp stab to both her hand and her bottom, "Ouch! What is it?"

Ron looked at her behind. "It's a piece of wood."

They looked at the splintered counter. "Great. I have a splinter in my arse."

"I'll get it out. Calm down." Ron said, reaching for the offending item. Hermione dodged out of his reach.

"What if part of it gets stuck in there?"

"It won't. Come on. Don't be a baby. Fred and George had splinters all the time and mum always just yanked them out."

"I don't want it getting lodged in there. I could get an infection."

"Oh come here." Ron grabbed Hermione gently by the waist with one arm and plucked the shard out with his other hand.

"Ouch!" Hermione tried to bounce away from him but he held her close.

"There. All better." He released her and held up the bit of wood. "Want to keep it? As a memento?"

Hermione hit him and finished buttoning her pants. "My butt is killing me."

"I'll just have to pay special attention to it for a few days." Ron said huskily, kissing Hermione's ear and inhaling the fragrance of her shampoo.

"You're insatiable." She kissed him on the lips, a quick peck. "Come on. They'll start to wonder where we've gone."

"Hermione, we went to the bathroom mysteriously at the same time. They'll know what we're doing."

Hermione glared at her boyfriend but didn't argue. The pair walked back out into the pub, blending in with the shady crowd as they slinked conspicuously to their table. Hermione winced as she sat down; her bottom still tender.

"You okay?" Harry asked.

She nodded, trying not to wince.

"Sitting's just a bit tender. Splintered wood is dangerous; they should really fix those counters." Ron smirked and received a hit on the arm.

"You didn't?" Ginny began.

"In the bathroom?" Harry added.

"Just now?"

"While we waited?"

"And in public?"

"The way you two speak together is unnerving." Ron said, looking between his sister and his best friend.

"Don't change the subject." Ginny said.

"Maybe we should change the subject. Poor Hermione's splintered bottom can't be comfortable for her." Harry said, smirking despite the sympathetic tone.

"In any sense." Ginny added to which they all laughed.

Except Hermione who glared at them, crossing her arms over her chest. "I hate you all."

((()))

So I wrote "Checkmate" (feel free to head over and read that) and I mention 'except that one time in the Leaky Cauldron bathroom' and it got me thinking… what /did/ happen that one time in the Leaky Cauldron bathroom? So here it is! Short and to the point but I'm rather fond of Ron and Hermione's little sexcapades! As always thank you for reading!


End file.
